Live, Laugh, Pray, Love Mommy

Anxiety is such an emotional monster. I tell you. It can be so debilitating at times. Just yesterday I had to get back on my meds because I was getting to the point where I was unable to function with life around me. I was constantly on edge, quick-tempered, worrying about this and that, happy and sad all at the same time it seemed. I wasn't present. I was zoned out -- often in a daze. I figured this wasn't good for my husband and my boys so I popped my pill. I stopped taking my medication around the time I was 6 weeks pregnant and I didn't take it after I had Omari because I was nursing him exclusively. Well, Omari is mainly on formula now. I nurse him in the morning and evenings, but now that I am taking my medication that will have to stop. I am fine with that. I have to take care of myself in this regard. I am not sure if I will have to be on medication forever but all I know is I need balance and this is what will help me right now.

Tuning out in 5,4,3,2,1....I would like to have a break please! And no, I am not talking about a piece of a Kit Kat bar break. I am talking about a kick off my shoes, relax, don't cook, don't talk, don't, don't, don't, just don't do anything because I deserve it kind of break! Whew! I'm glad to get that off my chest. It has been a minute since I have even posted anything because things have been so hectic and when I finally get some time to rest, I'm sleeping. A chick just doesn't have time to write anything and sometimes when the time arrives, I don't want to write because that requires thinking and my brain refuses to do such a thing when it's burned out. I feel bad, because Desi has watched more TV than I can stand over these past few weeks. I just need some time! I want to be by myself. Not forever, but for maybe a day. That's it. I want to enjoy a silent room and listen to my thoughts and connect with myself. Gosh, I saw a post on ...

So a few weeks ago I spoke about Desi reverting back to baby years. Well, it seems that lately he is trying to show a little independence. He wants to do things on his own. One time I pulled a plum out of his lunch bag and handed it to him. He pushed it away and said, "No, I can do it Mommy." He took the plum from me, put it back in the bag and took it out himself. Another night he got mad at me and said, "I'm the adult and you're the child Mommy!" Wha-what did you just say to me little boy?! LOL! I couldn't even correct him because it was just so funny. Interesting huh? He is really going through some changes. One minute he wants to be a baby and the next minute he wants to act like he is years away from my womb. LOL! Well, his growing feet are a true indication that he is becoming a big boy. A few Mondays ago, Chris and I took Desi to the mall to go shoe shopping. I decided that I wanted to get his feet measured. I am so glad that I ...

I was talking to a friend of mine today about our little 2 year old boys. Desi was crawling around the floor. I joked and said that he was reverting back to his baby stage. She happened to mention that her son was doing the same thing. He has been acting as if he were a little baby. In that moment of talking with her, I realized that my joke was really not a joke. It was a true statement. I flashed back to a few whiny moments and how clingy Desi has become. He has  become a little baby. I am pretty sure all kids his age go through this. I read that kids who revert back to their baby stage do that because they are growing up so fast and they are taking in so much that they want to revert back to what made them feel secure. I can see that. Shoot, sometimes I feel that way! I want to have a couple of tantrums and hop on my mommy's lap and nestle my head on her bosom. Now mommies, this behavior is perfectly normal. Only when your baby's motor skills start to revert backward will y...

Things have been so busy!!! My husband and I celebrated our 6 year wedding anniversary on the 8th of this month. I was going to do a special anniversary post, but there's just not enough time in the day. I will post some pics from our special day at the end of this post. Okay, so I have not felt like talking and playing with Desi for the past few days! I cringe as I write this, but it's true. I don't want to play and when I am driving him to daycare, mommy just doesn't feel like talking. Don't get me wrong, I do talk and play with him, but is halfheartedly. I don't know. Sometimes I just want to check out for a little bit. I need a break...like a go on a weekend get away by myself and with myself. I need to do this pronto because I want to give my full attention to my little munchie. I hope he doesn't notice how unexcited I am about playing and having a conversation with him. Omg! I need some R&R. Let me see where I can go for a weekend.... To be con...